The Changing World of Adoption
by Vicki Peterson

Almost 30 years ago, adopting internationally was just starting to become a recognized option. Initially, the challenge was finding prospective parents for needy children from other countries. Overseas adoption was not a common choice or widely understood among those interested in bringing a child into their lives.

Over time, enormous changes have taken place. By the early 1980’s Wide Horizons for Children was working in a dozen countries and each year placing more than 200 children with U.S. families. By the late 1980’s and early 90’s, our services to families had grown considerably, including cultural and post adoption work and activity. By the mid-to late 90’s we were placing approximately 500 children each year. In recent years we have placed 600-700 children annually.

Many of the changes that have taken place over the past few years have made the prospect of adopting a healthy young child more difficult. Many countries have had a growing concern regarding a shrinking youth population. In order to keep more children within their borders, governments are now offering incentive programs to encourage adoption by their citizens. In addition, many countries have put greater restrictions on overseas applicants. The combination of both these factors has made the prospect of international adoption much more daunting than ever before. In particular, adoption by single applicants has been greatly restricted by many countries.

While the issues of applying for domestic newborn adoption are quite different than those of international adoption, there are also developing challenges in this arena. Although there is an increasing number of unmarried pregnant teenagers in the U.S., most of these young people are not considering an adoption plan for their child. Our society now accepts the status of being an unmarried parent without the negative views that once were inherent in this choice. It has become more common for grandparents and other family members to accept and support young people who are having a baby. In addition, there are now many public services for pregnant teens and young parents. Therefore, although domestic infant adoption continues, it has not increased in proportion to the increasing birthrate among teenagers.

Coping with Change

It is important to keep in mind that there are millions of children over the age of two who need a family and flexibility is a must. If you are starting the adoption process, it will be very helpful to spend time discussing all your options with your home study social worker. Don’t eliminate any program where you meet the criteria. Also, consider applying to more than one program with the understanding that you will adopt from the first option that works for you.

Take advantage of pre-adoption education programs. These discussions and readings will answer many questions and help reinforce your long-range goal of adoption. Talk through the possibility of adopting an older toddler, a preschool age child or a child who is over the age of five. If you did not do so initially and you have already completed your home study, it may be to your advantage to go back and consider other options.

Look at the possibility of adopting a ‘waiting’ child who needs a family that can cope with an older age, risk, special condition or unusual circumstance. Consider children from different backgrounds and cultures. The more expansive you can be in the type of child you are open to considering, the better. Many families started with the intention of adopting one child but change their minds after learning about a sibling group that needs placement together. Others start with a plan to adopt a healthy child but during the process realize that they would be comfortable as parents of a child with a particular medical risk or need. Our experience leads us to believe that parents who look back on making such a decision cannot imagine their family in any other way.

If you are focused on adopting a baby and meet country-specific requirements for such an adoption, go into the process with a resolve to be patient. Keeping busy helps a lot! If you are currently working, don’t stop until you are further along in the process. This will make the waiting time a great deal easier. Your social worker and other adoptive parents can be a great source of support and encouragement during this period of time. Remember that you are not alone. We are experienced in dealing with unexpected changes and can help you consider all of your options.

Reaching Your Goal

Despite challenges that may lie ahead, adoption still remains a very successful way to build your family while providing a home for a child who might otherwise go without love and security. The wait for a child may seem to take a long time but it will bring many years of fulfillment. It is important to stay focused on your long-term goal of becoming a parent. While the process may be challenging, once your child becomes part of your family you will be their mother or father forever. Difficulties you encountered will quickly be replaced by the joy of having a child in your life.

We are helping to bring more children into families than ever before. Our adoption work regularly shifts as we respond to the children who need families all over the world. We have worked with thousands of families all over the U.S. who have successfully brought a child into their lives through this extraordinary process. Rest assured, if adoption is the right decision for you, we will help you during every step of the journey ahead.

Wide Horizons For Children has an office in West Hartford and will soon be opening an office in Fairfield County. For more information, call 860-570-1740 or visit www.whfc.org.